Why aren't we the best?

So many persons have planned and projected that they will be the Best in whatever they do in this new year. Maybe its because persons see the move from one year to another as the ending of one chapter and preparing to enter a new chapter. However it boggles the mind at times as to why one should wait until the end of one year, since if you look carefully at it, each day is the dawn of a new era/chapter. I would even suggest that waiting until the end of a year can be a daunting task since there has been the accumulation of both good and bad, and, the thought of sifting through this entire matter may appear impossible.

This now supports a point where someone can be the best in their character. There was some years back a caribbean company which looked at and had as their slogan "Being the Best". This focused on the internal relationships moving to a state of world class which would have spilled over into the external relationships. However during the process, the company undertook to do one massive campaign from branding to staff meetings and interest groups and sessions to think-tanks. Of course this was not sustainable, and what eventually happened was that persons eventually returned to their old ways of relating. My suggestion in such a case would have been to reverse the channel taken and start out as a spark. This spark having a ripple on effect from a project lead who then would have had the opportunity to encourage other staff to get on the band-wagon. Of course this change management person would have to have a strong character and have the drive to succeed. Once they stoke the flame of change and encouraging the persons to be the best that they can be, it would be very rewarding and the objective of creating a better relationship would have occurred.

Naturally - this writer should not have to tell you that you need to be the best that you can be, you know it, we know it, everyone else knows it. Why then aren't we the best?

I can think of at least two ways, and i'm sure you can find a few more:

1) The will to be the best has dried up.

Its like someone with a creative talent, who does not follow their dream or at least feed their passion. When a creative artist works another job, and stays in that job without feeding their desire to be creative, they lose the muse of inspiration as evoked in Shakespeare's - Henry V, "O for a muse of fire that would ascend the brightest heaven of invention..." As a human being, one has to be inspired to be the best, they may gain this by either the end result of their contribution or the challenge to get going. If either one of these are not met, eventually the drive to be the best can become a drudgery.

2) Laziness.

I say nothing more - since I believe this speaks for itself.

So, let us daily look at how we can be the best in the present tense, since this is the only guaranteed time which we have.

Impossible + ( ' ) = I'm Possible

Did you ever notice that "Impossible" and "I'm Possible" have practically the same spelling? I didn't realise this fact until recently while conversing with my wife, she was supporting an idea which we were discussing, and it ended where I said..."initially this idea may have been considered impossible, and she suggested that is was no longer impossible but I'm possible..."

Before going further - I believe everyone understands what is meant by impossible...that is - it just will not or cannot be seen to happen (whatever that may be). Conversely, I'm possible should already conjure the image of potential enery and the idea of "I AM Possible", that force/capability to be able to achieve whatever one has set as a goal.

In addition, we'll be using the formula below:

{Impossible} + ( ' ) = I'm Possible

Looking at this formulae, you have to have therefore some idea of where you are going to end or at least what goal you would like to achieve. This all begins with a thought. Now following the equation, Impossible is not the position that we want to be in, and we need to ask ourselves not necessarily how did we get into that position but how are we going to get out. Careful planning and thinking is needed, as even though you may want to leave quickly, one has to do so deliberately and armed with as much information in their roadmap as possible. It may also be useful to note the settings or conditions of your current state of impossible, as this may be useful markers and testament when you tell others where you started. In the initial condition or state, there is the sensation of overwhelming dread and also fatigue which will arise. What one has to do at this point in time is to dig in, but this more that likely will feel like your last surge of energy. One has to remember what the trigger was, that made you decide that you will climb out of your perceived impossible state. Therefore, this last surge must be focusedm, like when you focus the sun's rays through a magnifying glass.

You may need some support - here goes, taken from the lyricist Joe Darion "...To dream ... the impossible dream ...To fight ... the unbeatable foe ...To bear ... with unbearable sorrow ...To run ... where the brave dare not go ..." and furthermore I have included this video clip by Honda - which many vote as the "best Honda commercial"...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fB_1gPRCLCo and this clip best sums up the movement we want to achieve especially the suspence at the end.

Now onto the 2nd part of the formula:

The ( ' ) can represent that hope or the high ideals that we can aspire, as it is "suspended" overhead. Therefore we need to extend our reach and grow in our maturity to focus on leaving our current state by doing or reaching for something. Now if we remember previously that we said its like the last surge of focused energy, therfore we are so convinced within our minds first that we are leaving our impossible and heading on the new direction that even the rest of our body aids us in getting there. Trust me - it happens and it works, mind first -> signal to neurons in the brain that we are bout to act -> chemical reaction started -> muscles equiped with necessary torque -> brain signals -> ACTION. Can you imagine that all of this is held in this one symbol ( ' ) ? If you can then you are well on your way. Now once in action, we place the ( ' ) into position where you add it to impossible. If you realise that this little symbol has now changed the entire meaning of impossible to the exact opposite.

Impossible: Not possible, unable to be, incapable

I'm Possible: Acheivable, tenable, imaginable

So, walk with me - rather let's persevere in our equation and work towards possible.

Push 1, 2, 3...

One of my contemporaries, who has recently been going no where in the course which she mapped but rather spinning in the mud needed someone like a huge JCB tractor to push them out of the sandpit and onto the greens. If you are familiar with the game of golf, sometimes you take your stroke with the 7-iron and all the factors are just right to land either in the hole or just shy of it. However the gust of wind which you didn't expect or the topography of the turf, sees your golf ball landing in the middle of the sand pit. What do you do? Some persons take the ball up and place it on the edge of the pit and forfeit a point/stroke while others just dig in and blast that ball out of the pit with the club.

In other words, like one success coach stated: Sometimes, one nudge in the proper direction is all one needs to breakthrough!

The trouble is sometimes while in the sandpit just stuggling, the person who has to come and nudge you out of your spot should ultimately be stronger, or, both individuals must be willing to put their minds together and get out. Of course, there are a few things which have to be on the checklist. These include:

1) The person in the pit recognising their current position of "distress".
So often, you believe that the person realises that they are just spinning in the sandpit, but at times they do not know. You as an external entity, should highlight to the individual their current position. Warning!!! This is not always an easy task, since there will be the initial barrier from the individuals and then breaking the ice. In addition to this, there is the possibility of depression setting in from the "sandpit" individual since nothing seems now to be going right. Be mindful that this is a state of mind that can present its challenges, this is why I've suggested having as open an attitude as possible.

2) An open attitude - to accepting someone coming along and nudge you out!
Of course it must be noted that the person coming along should also have an open attitude, as no one says that it will be easy. Even though the end result should be to get back on track, attitude makes a huge difference. If you doubt me - when you go to your next show look for the attitude.
When the performer leave the wings of the stage and move centre stage they know that the audience is focused on their every move. They walk slowly and with a purpose, maybe even a slight smirk to the audience to give a warm sensation. As soon as they reach the microphone, all of the energy bottled in the attitude bursts out and infuses the audience.
Similarly - the attitude of both parties should be "expectant" and looking forward to achieving the end result. I would even suggest that each progress and landmark should be celebrated such that it plants permanently in the psyche that you have moved, and forces you to keep moving since you'll be "rewarded" at the next landmark. Overtime seeing your progress helps make the job effortless or should I say - equip you with strength to gain momentum.

Conversely avoid persons with horrible/negative attitudes...for obvious reasons, you'll be wealthier for it.

3) The willingness to leave the sandpit.

So - like the heading says, Push - on my count: one, two, three...

Disability of inability

The disability of inability seems so easy to chat about, but we will still take a look at this matter. When defined, disability means a lack of adequate power, strength, or physical or mental ability; an incapacity. In defining inability, this may be seen also as a lack of power capacity or means. One may want to argue that this is a circular type of reasoning more of a "catch 22", but if you look at the perspective that one may lead to the other then the circular reasoning may be dispelled.

So often when you wonder why persons are not acheiving or reaching their optimum balance it may be suggested that it is as a result of them miscalculating their true potential. Conversely, taking a snap shot of all of those persons who have visible/known disabilities and how they have moved beyond that form of limited capacity to exercise huge feats, it proves that the disability cannot be the inability to achieve. Immediately coming to mind was the example of Stevie Wonder, who did not and has not let his disability lead to inability. More focused on the point is that mentally we have to overcome the mere thought of inability. Just allowing a thought of inability to lodge leads to disability.

We can convince ourselves so easily that we are unable to be a better person, that we are unable to be successful, that we are unable to take charge of our destiny and head towards that goal. Subsequently the acceptance of our inability to be what we are called to be, makes us disabled. We then look for a pity party as to why we can be no better, and why the formulae to reach our true potential cannot work and we want all and sundry to cry with us.
"BAHH Hum-bug"

Look at the effort needed to overcome an specific obstacle as the stepping stone to grow. We are unable to acheive if we think so, but the moment that we change our thought process, we have stopped being disabled. It should not stop there, our efforts should then in one form or another look to assist someone else. Now that you have recognised that your acheiving can help someone and teach someone else to achieve, you have the effect to influence - use it!

The abundance of the heart the mouth speaks...

Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks...

So many times we do not realise that we've spoken what is on our hearts until we see the effect the words have taken upon another individual. Of course, even moreso in the situation between a guy and a girl as he comes to grips with telling her what is on his "heart" this becomes challenging. This is so, since dealing with such intimate emotions in humans even though in the heart are suppressed and almost into none existence. Conversely no one wants to be professing every single thing that he/she has conjured up, to another, but - we digress a bit.

There is something called paralanguage, which refers to the non-verbal elements of communication, which when one really looks at it, is the tell-tale sign even before one speaks, as to what is in their heart. If one is keen on identifying these non-verbal elements, then it is very easy to read what is in the heart. Sometimes what is on the heart is so intense that the mouth literally spews the information content out. However the mind must be taught in many circumstances to think before speaking, yet there are instances where this threshold is broken before the thought process has been completed. I would suggest that there are many times whereby the mouth should speak exactly what is on the heart. Look at the infant. When an infant thinks about something - he'll quickly acknowledge and openly ask a question as to why or make a comment. It is this raw openess that is so pure about the innocense of the child. Ask a child exactly what he's thinking and without hesitation or fear of victimization he'll tell you. ask an adult and they'll hesitate...see the difference?

So, in this chapter, you should be asking yourself, what has been conjured in my heart? Recently I've had the crazy opportunity to have dealt with some "church" people. If I could have spewed exactly what was on my heart to the group, they would immediately be highly offended. However as per the instructions garnished about the various situations, had I gushed the thoughts to these persons, then they would not have been able to handle it. Furthermore, the minds of the consorts seem so small, that they would dwell on the postman rather than the letter which he brought. I therefore would indicate that one should analyse the situation first if at all possible and under the best of our judgement decide the best way to express the abundance of the heart.

Personally it took about three weeks to complete this particular leaf, since it caused me to try to wrap my head around this particular subject, so much so that I don't even think that we have scratched the surface properly...

However - till next chapter...Remember if its in your heart...it will come out - either verbally or in your body language. If you doubt me - as the psychologists.

LibeRato

Here I was at a piano recital recently and realised that this whole thing was so uninspiring, that it made me wander, mentally - that is... All kinds of thoughts and reasonings and supposings and such like. It was during the intermission that a former school mate came over and said this concert was oh so "nice" and I said well not really. It was after my response that she said - you know, my mind was wandering about architecture and landscapes and all that stuff.

Now I highlight this scenario since, so often when you ask someone "how's everything?" and they say "all is fine" the truth is, its a facade. We go around with our facades (not that it is bad), but here it is - we've bottled up and plastered on our public what a composed individual we are, when this isn't true. Sometimes - it helps to just let it fall out, not wear the facade and be yourself. This I must say is totally opposite to what we normally do. We hide, we shun, we make our true state obscure. Sometimes this is good, and then again, when you show your real self you become even further human. Have you ever noticed that at death nothing is hidden?
Similarly - our best state is while we sleep to see the real person. During this state of rest - we cannot pretend to be fine and dandy, we cannot hide any expressions, even scientifically, the real emotion comes to surface, while we dream.

Here's a suggestion:
Find someone at one of these extremes - Either very close to you or a perfect stranger.
Tell them one thing you'd like to change/improve about yourself...

The result?
You'll feel better about telling them - since whether they pass judgement or not you'll feel liberated.
Try it...

Losing is good

I'm sure that you don't have to be reminded what it feels like to lose...However life, and circumstances cannot help us at times and we are unable to win. There are those times when we've gotten so arrogant and pompous that we forget what it is that helped us get into our successful position I therefore say - Kudos for losing. When we lose, it should easily hit us that either we've not prepared properly, or we over anticipated what we had hoped our result would have been. It may be also understood that when you lose, there may be some lesson in there for us to learn, whether that lesson is how to plan better next time, how to deal with losing, how to use the loss and a motivational tool to overcome the next step.

Maybe this is over the top, lets look at an example, your favourite cricket team runs into the stadium and it is the home turf. Immediately as they all appear this is an uproar in the stadium with all of those home fans. Of course the visiting team gets a welcome as well but not as enthusiastic. So the games begin and each time the home team gets the lead the visitors seem to have the key to get a come-back. As it gets closer to the finish the fans cheer on, supporting the home team, the pressure builds, the flags raise and there is the sure victory. Then by some element of surprise as if knowing the home team's strategy, the visitors clench the game and everyone else is disappointed that the home team loses. What does that feel like?

I say in this case, this should drive the homeboys to go back to the drawing board. Or moreso like an exerpt I saw recently... "Overnight Success - Those that want strong and healthy teeth tomorrow should brush their teeth very well today, successful people work while others rest, they study while others sleep, they take action while others observe..."(read more) We all know that there is the need to celebrate our victories but then we may go overboard and a recent loss wakes us out of our slumber. Back to the homeboys losing the cricket game, the guys may be tempted to go around blaming everyone and everything for our loss. We know how true it is, now imagine how it feels to lose US$6 Million, whether its money or a game or a competition the first thing we should look at is ourselves and how effective was our calculated approach.

Anyway - when you lose one should:

a) Forget about who you think is to be blamed and work on improving next time. Remember the time spent on the blame game could be used to move you to your lesson or next goal faster.

b) Admit the loss, and admit you want to win

c) Plan to win next time, feel the victory and stealthily work towards it. Even if you don't tell everyone what your next step is (which is sometimes a good thing) work feverishly on it.

d) Losing does not mean that you are a failure. You become a failure if you give up.

e) Share with someone who loses your path to overcoming the loss and how to get back into winning. They'll thank you for it later, maybe losing wasn't only for you to learn something but to share the experience with someone else...Do Not Be Selfish.

Here's a quote, some of you may know...
Second Place is the First Loser...

Desiderata

Sometimes we need to take a step back and ponder...enjoy my friends

Desiderata
-- written by Max Ehrmann in the 1920s

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love, for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

Six Inch Heel

I was recently admiring a young lady and the six inches of heels which she wore. At that point in time she is standing in one position and more or less remained in a very classy poise. This as I commented was the ultimate in grace and form. Then, there came the point in time where she had to move from this position and leave the establishment. Of course as mentioned before the heels look like six or seven inches and did this lady wobble across the floor, as she made her way to the door.

It was this which prompted me to write about the six inch heel, since out of this scenario can be derived two types of personalities. The two characters would be: 1) The person who is comfortable and shows the comfort in what they do; and 2) The person who trys to be comfortable and wobbles to make themselves appear comfortable. Lets look at them both.

1) When a lady, is comfortable in her six inch heel, she stands tall, she seems confident and her walk is as if she glides across the room, all the while making everything look effortless. Similarly, as you come into a position of decision making you should be comfortable enough to stand tall work up the confidence and deliver. Note that leaders as per a previous post, exude confidence that literally forces the group to follow. As our model walks around, she knows that there are eyes on her and that there are persons ooohing and aaahing about the shoes, and even though we do not like it, the leader will also get that oooh and aah.

2) Conversely there are those who try to be comfortable, but they seem to make a mess of how they walk and there is the ultimate fear that they may also trip. Need I say that they air of grace and control seems to lack and they stumble towards you as you brace for their presence. There are those leaders who hobble along the path. Sometimes that leader is us (you & me), trying to get comfortable with those around us and forgetting that we should practise being comfortable with ourselves first. Then, rather than practising on the 2-inch heel we want to jump straight to the heavy rollers, not learning the lessons of progression. In addition, the position of decision making becomes littered with indecision and blunders and then the masses lose confidence in you as an inspiration. Remember, when you go to vote, you have an image of a strong individual as you cast your ballot, not someone who bumbles along.

So, let us make it a point to ensure that our lives and the current position which we hold, we become comfortable in them first before moving onto the next level. Do not forget to draw on those resources around us, to which we must learn from, as well as when making a decision, be positive that this is the best possible choice made under the current circumstances. Note the high society persons have image consultants who work on keeping up the good appearance of the client. You can use those around you to assist in your positive image and ensuring a confident look is achieved.

Photo credit: http://www.sahras-heels.com

Its like Magic in 3 Steps

I've been involved in a group project recently, and I believe that there is always some kind of lesson to learn. One of the many which struck me was that, there is a certain magic which a leader must have in order to inspire the rest to follow. Coming to terms with this can be a bit of a jolt at times, since you as a leader must also be inspired in order to inspire, and everyone knows that everyday our feel or mood isn't one which is in the motivating stretch. In fact a leader has to look for ways to be motivated in order to share that magic.

One individual said to me, that there are so many persons out there who, struggle to lead their teams. They have all of the information to share, and the ideas to implement, but they somehow do not have the magic to get the team to run with the idea. There are a few of the things which made good leaders better, a leader has to:

A good leader has to

1) Get into the mind of his supporters
It may seem easy enough to do, but unless you can capture the imagination of the people then to get into their minds may be a bit difficult. In order to get into the minds, you have to have a strong sense of belonging and a good sense of direction. Not too arrogant but know how to move the masses. The entire person/leader has to be transformed; the body language must say “I am comfortable with myself...” Now that you are comfortable, you must also see yourself as the leader but not arrogant. Remember you are now getting into the psyche of your supporters, and being full of yourself will not win the masses. Your character must be one which persons recognise as acceptable, and you must be trustworthy.

2) Inspire the thought process of the group
What inspires you?
Now try to put yourselves into their shoes and see yourself being inspired and you should be able to translate. This should then give-way to your sharing of some sort of inspiration, which you can pass on to the group. It does not necessarily have to be the same things that inspire you but you should look to inspire your group. You’ll know when they have found it, since they will tell you either in action or in words, you will see it. Take time out to meet with them as individuals and also meet them collectively, show that you are the right person in the position, and that you are also human at times. Give them a good word...

3) Find a way into the hearts of the group being led
Notice how the cult leader works, they do exactly this step above and it somehow becomes magical. The group then supports the leader’s motives and objectives and each time there seems to be a usurping of authority the leader steps in and somehow weaves his magic. This tugs at the emotions, and there are times when the leader has to have that heart to heart. In addition you have to be sincere, if not, persons will easily see through the image projected.

Now, who says that this can’t be done for a good purpose? Without those three steps it’s flaccid.

Photo credit: "Static Ball Remix" http://www.brockadam.net

New Driver in the House

I've decided to stay on the driving topic again....

Sometimes when one has recently passed their driving examination and now have the full license to drive solo, there is a certain feel of power in their hands. This may be heavily based on the psycological position of the individual. There is the immediate desire to rush down the highway at top speed and throw caution to the wind since one feels invincible. In chatting with some new found friends recently, there was two sides of this coin.

---
In one instance one person had just gotten their license. This individual somehow slammed into everything in sight, and the neighbours were so afraid to park their vehicles nearby for fear of damage which may be sustained to their own vehicles. This is so similar to how we handle life and also success on our own. Somehow we have to stuggle to work out how to navigate against the coffee machine guy in the office or the secretary who spreads your personal business, or even the group leader who is sometimes so full of themselves. How do you handle these people?
Easy, you take your time, think first and speak afterwards, and, respond only when necessary.

Note, most of the times, no one recognises when you've screwed on the handle on the door or replaced a dull lightbulb, because they may be the little things but you know what! Those things are also very important.

There are leaders who believe that they are the kings and queens of the roost. I always try to encourage them to change their thinking. Here's why - without a vehicle, you are no longer a driver but a pedestrian, just an ordinary person. Likewise, without a group to lead then who are you? Many times the leader in their pompous attitude unwittingly destroys this group unwittingly.

What a leader must recognise is that there are all sorts of persons who compose the group. There are the spark plugs of the groupd and the handrests as well - that is various roles. If you do not know group dynamics then your driving skills are shot. I also believe a good leader can say to the group, I do not know, but i'll find out, or easily delegate to another member. It is also okay for the leader to sit in the passenger seat at times and experience what his passengers are feeling in the ride.

See you next time...

Learning to Drive

When you are learning to drive, there is an instructor who takes you through your paces. For months you manage not to argue and more or less sit humbly in the driver's seat and follow the commands and advice of the driving tutor.

Then there comes the time where you sit and finally pass your driving examination. One becomes all excited and yeah, we are now legally qualified to command that vehicle on our own. As we proceed along the various carriage-ways now, we realise more and more that there are bums and idiots who maskerade as experienced drivers and we try not to lose our calm. However, there always come a point where we may lose it and the road rage jumps in, and we now become angry at the last person who cut us off on the intersection.

Similarly, we in our development on the success path have been coached and tutored by our mentors. Then we feel, or are prompted to get out there and command our own success, and make it work. What makes me upset at times is when persons prefer to stay within their own sad story or have had an accident along the way, and not try to get back onto the highway (of life). You know the ones, since at some point or the other we try to avoid them - before they suck us into their own black hole.

Warning: Everyone has a sad story.

Anyway, as one drives we overcome the driver errors made and race onto the next destination. Why don't we also do the same thing on a personal level?

In addition we at times like to show off, similar to when we overtake on the highway, we show we've got more power under the hood, check me out, look at my rims and my sound system is blasting. I would encourage anyone to be cautious in business, since it can peak today and valley tomorrow. In fact take a look at what is happening now in the global economy, there is all the talk about pending recession, your business and you as a leader need to tred carefully. This does not mean being timid!!! Its like tipping the breaks, before a step downhill.

Here's further parallelism:

A friend of mine whenever she drives gets a flat tyre...and believes that it is her lot in life to keep getting a flat tyre. After a period of helping her change the flats and getting back to focus on driving - Opps something happens and a tyre goes flat again. This would suggest to me that either she is driving in an area that she should not be driving and should change direction. If it were me, I would immediately look at self, and try to figure out if it is because of me that my tyre goes flat or it is just the type of tyre being chosen. Based on statistical evidence, it may be suggested that it is possibly the driver choosing an inappropriate tyre and then getting upset at the whole world.

When you go about your routine (highway) consider your success path and see how parallel they are, and also recognise that you are in control of your own vehicle (attitude).

Photo Credit: http://www.mckague.com

Opportunity Knocked

When something like this (opportunity knocking) happens to so many of us, rather than accepting and grabbing the opportunity we sit there and wait, so much so that it moves from opportunity knocks to opportunity has knocked and flown. There are several emails which we can see or which we receive on a daily basis telling us to either add your name and forward to ten friends or reply and see what happens, and, do you know what? Quite a few persons follow the instructions...However then the opportunity is knocking we sit there, have a cup of tea and wait for it to leave.

What is not right though is that after letting the opportunity fly away we labour over the next person who answered the call, and we become quite upset that they seized the moment. Funny how we think opportunity will pull up in a stretch limo and serve us chill rose blush. Sometimes it might but most of the time it probably won’t, since it may be suggested that we have to seek out the opportunity in the circumstances, and be prepared to run/walk/fly when it turns up. So many times we want the opportunity to turn up and when it does we are not prepared to move with it, but what may be said is that this should teach us to be organized for the next one.

Given that this is titled, opportunity knocked, as was alluded to earlier, we still have to go and look for the prospect in whatever circumstance which we may be facing. It may be noted that never mind whatever dumps we may be in, we can find the ladder out of it, or at least use the dump to make a platform to climb out. I dare say that you may be very lazy and no one will tell you this because they want to be your friend, and prefer if you stay in the same sludge. Stop making excuses to stay in the same circumstance! In speaking with persons about the world of online opportunities to make an impact they get excited, then two weeks later nothing comes out of the initiative, only very few and talented persons carpe diem. Beware of those who always agree with you, for they will not point out when an opportunity has arisen for your own self development nor will they support you in your quest for progress, conversely beware of those who are supper supportive. “Who the cap fits, let him wear it...” Bob Marley.

Moreover there is no time like the present; the only individual who does not get an opportunity is the one who would have pass away. The Caribbean is probably one of those few regions where, persons who believe that once they have reached 50 years of age it is now the end of the road. Changing this thought process may take generations, but there is some change happening as slow as it may be, for it may be forecast that this current generation, looks to grab as many opportunities as they can and at whatever age in order to progress. Take a look at the Ackee tree found heavily in Jamaica, this grows and grows and every season it produces fruit without fail, as long as the flower is fertilised (opportunity) then the tree will produce the delicacy. Just imagine what would happen if the fertilisation process was missed a few times, a major economic industry would come to a halt. Similarly, do you know what impact that you are making when you grab the opportunity which presents itself?

Think about it...right now I am going to look for my next opportunity, I think that you should too, see you next time...

Photo credit: http://www.naturalsciences.org/education/treks/bluebird/pages/Knock-first.html

Security & Barbed Wire Attitudes

When running a business, any business rather, the first thing that your client when visiting your office will have to deal with is the attitude of your security. Yes we are living in a much more sensitive time where terrorism is of much more concern than back in 1970, but it does not mean that your security has to have anti-customer friendly practices.

Think about it:

1) You are going to an event of some kind, and you have your pass/ticket/permission clearance and you are all excited about going. Yeah!!! As you pull up to the entrance there is one person, the first person of the establishment, security, who has the attitude of a hungry wasp, and everyone cowers as they try to conduct business in as polite and as civil a fashion as possible. There is no smile no sense of - I've paid for this event and deserve a welcome - there is nothing but this waspy attitude. What do you do?

2) Similarly we as humans have this exact issue towards others and do not realise it. We and I say we, tend to put up this barbed wire, towards persons we do not like or to get away from others. However, has anyone ever stopped to think about trying a smile? Yeah its difficult sometimes and also when you feel the need to frown you turn your frown upsided down. Plus i'll tell you to smile to, because as some recent research shows, it can help you to live longer, since you'll release some good chemicals which assist in aging.

I dealt with security, and as you should get by reading the jist of previous posts, one should attempt to conduct themselves with a business like manner. In this instance, there was the need to get to a specific location, and this was not the first time that the request was being carried out. However each time, the security officer asked the same question and I gave them the same answer, all was well. This went on for sometime until one evening, I proceeded as usual and was stung by security's barbed wire attitude asked what my purpose was, so I ignored this and easily stated that I was her to conduct my usual business as has been the norm for the past weeks. However this time the security at this institution, indicated that I could go no further, and that there was no need for security to seek further information as to my reason for business. I felt some personal agitation erupting and immediately backed away from the security point. Armed or should I say injured with this sort of abuse, I (the client) now had the advantage with this institution since bad press is not something a business house desires. After persuing this further, I took it to a higher level of pecking rank, and was appeased with the attitude met earlier.

In fact I think that this last note gave me the clue, if we are bold enough, take the opportunity to tell security to try smiling sometimes, BUT, do not leave it just there outline the 10 reasons they should smile. I would also suggest that one should note the attitude which they receive and be absolutely certain that it is not due to their own egos nor their own self centered attitudes, that the person (security in this instance) responds. It is too easy to place blame on someone else, but in the instance that you are convinced that your own barbed wire orientation is not the reason for a hostile response then smack them with a smile immediately, breathe deeply and then think clearly your next action.

For some persons in the Caribbean, this may be a huge learning curve since the first reaction is a good 'ole cuss out/bassa bassa. Why stoop to such when you can be the more matured individual, plus it feels good when you are matured about it.

Photo credit: http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0WTb_z_cqhIQbcAMw2jzbkF/SIG=12ao8qarh/EXP=1219085439/**http%3A//www.sillyjokes.co.uk/wacky/props/barb-wire.html

Justifying our Actions in 3 Points

Hello Everyone

Glad that you've visited today...

I've decided to touch on a few reasons why persons may find it necessary to justify their actions, especially persons who may be guilty of one thing or the other. I cannot tell you if you specifically will find an answer by the time you get to the end but at least I want to try shoving your thinking a little bit. Please also bear in mind that these are also real individuals, since I believe that it is real situations that make us and that's why you will continue to read on.

Lets look at this guy - Mac - who is considered by many to be short and sometimes attention seeking. I had the opportunity to meet Mac on several occasions, and realised that there are some tendencies to be attention seeking. Lets highlight that this is not a psyco-analysis of Mac, however there were some strange actions which seemed to simulate the actions of a dog on a fire hydrant. First question which came to mind was, Why? Then as was prefaced in this instance, mac was attention seeking and needed to command his audience. The only way sometimes persons think that they endear themselves to others is by drawing attention to themselves. It is this same strategy that Mac (or as someone indicated to me his nickname as second hopper), use to attract some females. It only works for the time being. Mac may have all of the material things available, but human-ness and self confidence may need topping up.

Second instance:

Mr. Neal - who is a sales guy tried to sell me the idea of playing the lottery. Now I am not a proponent of this sort of gaming and therefore was not convinced by any methods which games of chances use. In this case Mr. Neal, used as a reference his knowledge of the Holy Bible, indicating that there is no where in the Holy Bible that states that you should not play the lottery. Again, I am not proporting to be big on all of the principles of the bible but at least there are some moral positions which one has to take. Now here again is Mr. Neal, is looking to convince himself and myself that there is nothign wrong with playing the lottery. What I would also suggest is that Mr. Neal should not have to press so hard on my thought process to convince me that there is nothing wrong here. In fact, I dare say that maybe one of the same moral positions may be pricking Mr. Neal's conscience in order to slap him into justifying his position.

Another take on this is that as long as you as an individual feel comfortable and confident within yourself there is no need to "justify" your action, since you have become settled internally. That is, you will be able to sleep at night. Mind you, one cannot do this without some level of confidence if not you will start a vicious cycle of doubting yourself that your actions were justified and your outlook on life is changed negatively and you become depressed. This is not a justifying action!!! Furthermore, as someone who was reading this chapter said, you can easily become walled in showing an extroverted facade making everyone thing life's a breeze or introverted and withdrawn with a "shy" demeanor.

Consider next time that when you try to justify your action that:

1) You can only try to convince yourself that you've vindicated yourself

2) After a while no one believes you when you struggle to justify your actions

3) Can you sleep comfortably afterwards?

Photo credits: http://www.breadwig.com/uploads/illustration/antsaver.jpg

Come on Baby, Light My Fire - In 3 Steps

"Come on Baby, light my fire..." these Doors lyrics can be interpreted now in so many ways, with so many connotations. However in this instance we look at the example you have on your circle of influence. Even though I touched on this a few months/posts ago, I felt inclined to take another look at this in a slightly different case. There is a certain karma which each person has, however strong or faint which may cause one person to "light" another. I'll show you what I mean, and what led me to write this post.

Just a few days ago, I purchased a book and had an opportunity to meet with the author. I did highlight to the author that i'd blog on some of the stuff in the book and my interpretation of some of the chapters. It was during the conversation that I recognised that the author had a light bulb moment. I even understand that our conversation was used to ignite further such that other. One must take into consideration that three steps are important:

Step 1: Be Receptive - Coals 1

When you take a look at a set of coals you realise that they do not resist the fire of their neighbouring coal. And the entire set remains ambient for a very long time. Do you think that you can do that? So oft we as humans lose that human-ness since we build a wall around ourselve in order to protect our own egos.

Step 2: Share - Coals 2

Furthermore have you ever removed one coal from a whole set of coals? That one coal will try to burn/kindle whatever it comes into contact. In addition in the Caribbean, you recognise that villages live just the same, they share the joys and sorrows of the villagers and some may even call them malicious(inquisitive). The Caribbean community still live as if there is so much family around them, for example when a member dies that community shuts down and attends the service. How many other countries outside of the Caribbean do you know that this sharing goes on.

Step 3: Learn for when the cycle begins again.
It would be hard to have to learn the same idea over and over. We as persons should be graduating each time a fire is lit. This enables us to grow and develop.


Now when you look at it, take a look at your concentric circles of concern and see how you can create or even ignite further a blaze.


Photo credit http://ashburn.weblog.com.pt

Spending 9/10ths of Your Money

I was doing a bit of reading recently and came across three concepts of financial maturity and just had to read it, (i would encourage you to visit the site as well). Those three simple concepts have proven that some of the big packages do arrive in simple wrapping. What, should become clearer in this message though is that we should manage our financial resources like how we would manage our business, whether personal or professional. That is, if you can't handle it get help. No one becomes mature overnight and no one has all of the answers however if you seek advice about managing your finances then you are in a better position to tell others and keep the link going.

So, there is the innate desire to "want" and the human will to forget about need, however the developed/maturing person recognises the difference and work on acknowledging it. When you are working on your success - you surround yourself with persons whose resources you can tap into, in this case financial. I speak to so many persons who find it difficult to grow into financial maturity, but you know the reason that they don't is that they are afraid to make the step.

There is a bit which inspires me from Iyanla Vanzant, she says in order to become rich you start with a cent. The cent is like the baby, and the penny is the sister, the 5 cent like brother and 10 cent and so on until the dollar which is like the parent. Therefore if you gather the baby (cents) together you accumulate and attract the rest of the family. Of course i'll tell you not to look at this just literally but find the bigger picture. So - plan your course, plan your goal and plan the finances around them being sure not to overstep yourself and not being afraid to be conservative against others who look like they have it all. Like the Richest Man in Babylon says: if you spend - spend 9/10th of what you have in hand, then you will always have something in hand. Trying it this week - as much as possible spend up to a maximum of 9/10ths of what ever cash you have and see that each time the remainder grows.

Let me know...

5 - Reasons Quitting Is Better

When you are running a show there are two words which you may need to keep as part of your vocabulary. Those two words - you've guessed it - "I Quit"...So often we pursue a goal which we've gotten so close too and not realise that we need to cut our ties, and in effect save time and money. This is like the boy/girl relationship so many of us have, where we seem to be putting in all of the effort and the other seems to be in for the free ride. You know what - they are indeed getting the free ride and you the good samaritan, but then one day, you wisen up, and what you do? You give them the boot and quit dealing with the bum, its better for you. In quitting this time it is better for you, but you have to recognise this and gear yourself up for it because you will feel devastated even if it was for a short time.

Now I was involved with the planning committee for an event, things were going well and all participants who were part of the organising of the event were doing their part. Then there was the group who we were organising the event for, and one got to recognise that persons in this group were just not following through. For example, they needed to work on individual projects for presentation and only 25% of them managed to show any sort of input and promise. Therefore as a business decision needed to be made four weeks away from the deadline, the most sensible one to make was to quit.

Five reasons Quitting is better:
1) You save your time and that of any others involved
In this case you deal with those who will become angered and those who become despondent and manage your own emotions. Ask them what they would have done if in a similar position weighing the pros and cons. Makes no sense working at an inefficient rate of 25%.

2) You save resources - it is more expensive fo produce at the 25% rate than the 80-90% rate

3) You save money - just cut your loses, and realise that a penny saved and a penny earned works in your favour here. I think this is also self explanatory...

4) You save your reputation - especially based on the situation, you look better producing at optimum. For instance no one feels good planning at a hit rate of 1 in 4. Furthermore - you still have some of your own sanity to preserve as well as your own ego. As much as persons indicate that they are not in anything for self - I will boldly state that there is some amount of self/ego in there.

5) You get to keep your sanity - Need I say more? However you get a take on this - you peace of mind is important.

Even though this post is about reasons to quit...I'll just end by saying...Don't Quit - its the easiest way out but sometimes its the only way out.

Money Trees

There is a need for money, but, it should neither be your ruler, nor should you "love" it, as the proverb goes: a fool and his money is soon separated.

Far too often I see persons who are made fools because of the love of this commodity. A commodity is exactly what money is, and it is the utility to trade. Think about the times when you had none, and then think about the times when you had enough to do what you wanted, easily both of those times conjure up significant emotions. Somewhere on the extremes are persons who become so full of greed that they no longer want enough but want more, such that they become dubious in their dealings.

When travelling the success road, the nose of the student must be clean as far as possible to any dealings with money. You do not want to lose your credibility in achieving success, if you doubt me read the many online articles about this. Letting the thirst for lots of money make you lose your prestine reputation is disgusting, and it may make you a very lonely person.

So - your responsibility is to strike a good balance, between credibility, the need, the want, the love of money, and how much we are prepared to sacrifice or contribute/volunteer to get money. You may find out that quite a few websites play on your emotions of the burning desire for money and forgetting the red flags - we buy into them. This same get rich scheme is what drives the Network marketing sites or Pyramid matrixes, and you know who always benefit? The person at the top...read the fine print and you at the bottom do all of the unsuccessful hard work.

Here's a tip: Avoid those "easy riches" program - if it sounds too good then it is not what you want to be caught in. We know in the Caribbean that quick money usually comes from some kind of dubious activity.

In conclusion - treat money as a commidity only - afterall, that is exactly what the rich do, and if you need money, then work for it and save the little you have, and if you can follow closely those principles as found in the book: "richest man in babylon" as this is one document which use trusted and common sense principals.

Ask for a trusted opinion... And use common sense

In the Caribbean - Money does NOT grow on trees.

Attraction Distraction (AD)

I found, that writing this piece at this time was a challenge. Amidst all of the various forms of inspiration and experiences the ability to just do it and write and achieve my goals felt a bit more difficult. There was no writer's block, neither was I so bored as not wanting to write, but there were so many distractions that I started to lose focus. This is what I now refer to as the attraction distraction. There is usually a good example of this when all of the guys in a group suddenly go quite as a vivacious female passes by, and the conversation ceases, this - is attraction distraction.

Anyway, there is the need to stay focused as much as possible on the thing which you want to achieve. One author I read, stated that when you eat, sleep and dreamt your achievement, it comes so much easier. This holds true since all of the energies in and around you support/act to aid in you achieving the goal. Do you think that you are going through attraction distraction? Here are some symptoms:

• Your goals presently look less appealing than your current interest
• You find that you are spending your energy pursuing things which may not contribute to your specific goal
• There is enough time to do all other interests but seem not to find enough time to focus on your goal

Well, I do not have a full solution for attraction distraction, but to just watch out for the onset of the symptoms. To counter the onset of, or the early stages of attraction distraction, it may be useful to chat with a mentor or confidant who can have your best interest in mind and who may also dare you to stay focused. In one recent calypso - "I Dare You" - the singer (Destra) suggests to the guy who is watching from a corner, to dare to come and dance with her. Obviously the guy was a bit intimidated and the girl doing the daring was in a power/commanding position.

Lets apply this: We should be working then towards the position of daring to achieve success...on little goal at a time. I'm sure we've all heard this but it is worth saying again.

In other words - Command Success from Attraction Distraction